I live by guidelines, not rules. Read on to see mine!
Rules don’t leave any room for life obstacles – where as guidelines can be more flexible.
Rules make you feel like you have succeded or failed, but reaching your goals isn’t that black and white.
Guidelines help you make the best decisions for YOU in that moment vs. rules are often times non-negotiable.
When it comes to food rules, nope, not for me. I will break every rule set for me. When Ben and I first started dating, he would try and create rules for me to help me lose weight or build muscle. I could never follow them for more then a few days. It’s just not in my nature.
I started making a list a while back of guidelines that are important to me, guidelines that help me explore myself and my life, guidlines that allow me to learn and understand what is good for my body and mind.
I received such great feedback on my last blog (read that one here http://kdrfitness.com/be-a-rule-breaker/ ) about why guidelines are better then rules, that I decided to give you the guidelines that work for me.
Here are MY guidelines:
- Use a small plate, it makes me choose less food.
- Eat protein at every meal, that helps keep me satiated.
- Water makes me feel better, drink more.
- Go to sleep by 10pm on weekdays.
- Check my email twice a day.
- Limit electronics in the bedroom.
- Eat at least 3 servings of veggies a day.
- Don’t be scared of fat!
- Spend at least 10 minutes in the bathroom like the boys, it’s quiet and peaceful, I get it.
- Limit negative body talk
- If I eat it everyday, get the best quality I can.
- Take my supplements everyday. Everyone around me will be happier.
- Limit conversation before coffee.
- Take 20-30 minutes everyday for soft tissue work, stretching, and meditation.
- Label my food so the boys don’t eat it.
- Hang from a bar everyday.
- Food prep – regardless of what day it is.
- Don’t sweat the small stuff.
- Limit social media after 8pm and limited on weekends.
- Use clothing as a measurement tool, not the scale.
- When I drink, I eat clean.
- Challenge myself.
- Lift weights at least 2x a week.
- HAVE FUN! Life is too short.
- Limit beer, stick to the clear stuff.
- Ask for help!
- If asked to share dessert…don’t do it. Order my own!
- Make sure the cat doesn’t sleep on my head.
- Strong glutes for life!
- Limit pushing my beliefs onto others, unless it betters their health and happiness 😉
Do you have a list of guidelines that are important to you? Write that shit down. There will be a day that doesn’t go according to plan, another family get together to tackle, a holiday to plan, or a life changing event that will get in the way of your rules, if you write your guidelines down you can always go back to them…use them to troubleshoot life.
Do you need help breaking the rules? I can help!
I hate rules! Ask my mom, I have been a rule breaker for some time.
This is me! Sometimes you come across an inflatable obstacle course on Lake Winni and trespass. Oops!
When it comes to food I think it’s important to have guidelines…not RULES.
When Ben and I opened KDR Fitness, we wanted to create a simple to use, easy to follow set of nutrition rules everyone could use to be healthier, lose weight, feel better and reduce inflammation. But, some people…like me…don’t like rules. In fact, I hate them! Give me a “rule” and I am sure to break it just because it’s a rule! Maybe your like me?! Do you hate rules?
Ben has rules he follows. I don’t. I tried using his rules, but, they never worked for me (see above…rule breaker!) and I realized I do so much better when I set guidelines for myself. So far my guildelines work for me!
One of my guildlelines is if I want it bad enough, I have it.
But…it wasn’t always like this.
I read a lot of books, articles, etc. and with so much information out there it was hard for me not to put nutrition rules on myself, like:
Eating within 30 minutes of waking up
Eating all organic fruits and veggies
Making sure I ate every 3 hours even if I wasn’t hungry
Not eating out because it was too difficult to manage calories and portions.
I found myself fighting every single rule put in front of me.
Those were rules I was imposing on myself. When presented with a obstacle like eating out, a family function, or an “I can’t afford to eat all organic” scenario I wasn’t sure what to do, which usually resulted in not eating anything or saying “fuck it, let’s eat everything.” Both of which were not great decisions.
I recently overheard a couple at the grocery store having a similar conversation. He was talking her out of buying non-organic berries from Peru but then proceeded to by a box of 25 cookies that were cheaper.
The rules that we impose on ourselves, sometimes, may actually hold us back. When I took the rules away I was finally able to explore, learn what worked for me, and actually understand what my body needed. Taking away rules meant that I could eat ground beef, rice, non-organic veggies and skip breakfast if I wanted to do so.
Guidelines are helpful, but RULES can be really harmful, especially when you become to set in your ways and punish your self when you break your rules. I learned that the hard way. Some people THRIVE off of rules, but, not me.
Guidelines are suggestions, such as: “try to eat vegetables and lean protein at every meal” or “try to keep most of your carbs to fruits, vegetables, and whole grains.”
Rules are statements such as, “you have to have 2 servings of vegetables and 20 grams of protein at every meal” or, “no carbs after 6pm.”
Rules don’t leave any room for life obstacles, where as guidelines can be more flexible. Rules make you feel like you either succeeded or failed, whereas guidelines help you to make the best decisions for you in that moment.
Stay tuned for the next article, where I will tell you the guidelines that I use to eat, live and work out.
What rules do have on yourself? Let me help you break them!
Do you need some help breaking free from your nutrition and fitness rules? We can help!
Measuring? Math? To plan lunch or dinner? Does it have to be that complicated to lose weight? No. It doesn’t!
I don’t count calories anymore, I tell you why in my last blog, http://kdrfitness.com/cellulite-wrinkles-and-scars/, I don’t measure my food all the time, and I sure as hell don’t deprive myself of things that I enjoy. Weight loss doesn’t have to be that complicated or miserable.
Now does it require some work? Yes, absolutely. Food is so readily available to us and portions seem to be bigger than ever before. Having a portion control system will help you be successful at weight loss/weight maintenance. Maybe you prefer counting calories, that’s ok. I think there are defiantly benefits to it but let’s be real…it’s not fun.
Seriously, who decided that the hamburger should double in size?
The good news is, you don’t have to count calories for weight loss. Yes! It’s true.
I use a couple of things to control portions:
- I always use a small plate.
- I use my hands to determine my portions.
Here how it works:
- My palm determines my protein portions.
- My fist determines my veggie portions.
- My cupped hand determines my carb portions.
- My thumb determines my fat portions.
If you’d like to start eating better, just take a look at your hand. Use your fist, palm, cupped hand, and thumb to practice calorie control – while avoiding the hassle of counting calories.
Now that you know this information, you need to put it into practice!
Let us help you do that with our “Drop Two Sizes” Challenge starting on Monday, September 25th. The program is PERFECT for getting a jump start on your Fall fitness. You won’t count calories or work out 7 days a week, but you will learn how to portion control AND learn all about healthy eating and how to work out for weight loss.
Let’s face it, if you are a busy professional, chances are you are – stressed out, overworked, short on time, tired and struggling to fit health and fitness into your life.
Aren’t we all busy professionals at this point? Running around trying to fit more things into a single day – from spending time on yourself to spending time on your career…don’t forget the family! Sometimes I even have to ask myself “Do I have time to workout today?”.
Yes, I know I work in a gym. You might say “it must be easy for me to workout and stay in shape”. However, I am still a busy professional trying to balance work, life, family and my health.
Making time for myself sometimes makes me feel guilty and selfish. Do you ever feel that way?
So for me “Do I have time NOT to focus on myself?” is a better question.
Well when you put it that way…
When focusing on yourself is hard.
Focusing on yourself is HARD. We as women know that. But, we usually don’t admit it…aloud. When I find myself straying TOO far from focusing on myself into focusing on other people/things, I try and map out the the big priorities to SELF-CARE. For me, that’s working out, de-stressing and food prep. Your self-care might be different, but it should include those three things.
When Ben was going through Chemo (you can read more about that here if you want), I realized that I was not consistent with movement/workouts, my meals were all over the place and my sleep (self-care) sucked. It was certainly a stressful time, but, I was still a busy professional that had to take care of myself.
Workouts: I was stuck in a mindset that I had to get in 4 hours a week of strength training, then 1-2 hours of conditioning or cardio. That’s 5-6 hours! Unrealistic for me at that time.
Meals: I was grabbing and going…with little to no planning or prepping whatsoever. I had this idea that food prep would take hours and I just didn’t want to do it. I would rather spend time with my husband supporting him while he was going through his battle.
Sleep: I don’t watch a lot of TV but when I do it was right before bed, with my phone in hand or in bed. I needed a distraction to help me unwind from the day.
At the end of the day, our health is the only thing we can count on. I realized I had to get back to taking care of myself.
So what strategies did I come up with?
These are what I used to help me. You have to figure out what your making time for, then where do you need to put more time in or what do you need to work on the most. You might decide to start small by just getting to the gym twice a week or you might try food prep on the weekends. Whatever it is, commit to that one thing for a few weeks before you add in more.
For my workouts, I realized that I didn’t have to workout 4-6 hours a week to feel strong, maintain my weight or muscle. I trimmed my workouts down to 30-45 min with 1 day of resistance training in the gym and 2-3 days of kettlebell or body weight workouts at home or anywhere. I also added in 15-30 min walks every day. The dog and I were both happier for it;)
For my meal planning. I started planning out what I was going to have for dinner each night and wrote it on our family white board. This allowed me to plan other meals (I don’t like eating the same things everyday) and prep accordingly. If you missed it, check out http://kdrfitness.com/mastered-meal-prep/.
For my self care, I revisited my Sleep Hygiene Rules – no phones in the bedroom EVER, no watching TV right before bed (I just love to lay in bed sometimes and watch TV), take my supplements 30-45 minutes before bed (the last one is hardest for me), if I wake up and cannot get back to sleep, GET UP. I used to lay there stressing out about not sleeping…which kept me awake. Putting that structure in place really helped me declutter my pre-bed time.
Are you a busy professional? We have a great resource for you (see below) that covers a lot of the things I talked about, gives you some great tips and tricks to help you re-focus on your self AND downloadable.
Just click on the picture below and follow the steps!
In my last blog “What I eat in a day”
, I mentioned that I only count calories a few times during the year. Over the last few weeks I have been asked why don’t I count calories year long.
Why I don’t count calories all year long.
1. It’s a pain in the ass. Seriously.
2. I don’t want to be confined to a piece of paper or app to tell me what to eat all of the time. Maybe I want that extra serving, or another beer…or whatever!
3. I am at the point where I can maintain my weight eating what I want. I know what works for me to keep my weight steady. This is the most important point for me.
A little back story about me.
My son, Logan, was born on February 9th 2004, I was 25 and weighed 180 pounds. That was really hard for me, because all through high school and my early twenties I weighed roughly 110lbs. ALL of the weight I gained, from 110 to 180, happened during my pregnancy. That was a lot of weight in a short amount of time on a 5’3″ frame.
Eventually, I got my weight down to 130 pounds and have stayed within 5 pounds of that weight for the last 10 years. It wasn’t easy to lose the weight! I had a lot of unhealthy habits that I had to break AND build new habits to create a healthier lifestyle. But, now I have the habits in place to maintain my weight.
Of course my weight fluctuates, but never really more then 5 pounds. My set point is 130 (your set point is the weight that you typically hover around for the majority of the year. You CAN change that set point, it just takes time.) Sometimes I have a little bit more muscle and less fat (lower body fat percentage, usually during the Spring and Summer), other times, it’s the opposite, more fat and less muscle usually during the colder months. But, same size clothing through the whole year, just sometimes a little looser then other times.
I am 100% ok with that.
Could I lose more body fat? Sure.
Could I gain more muscle? Sure.
But why? I will still have cellulite, wrinkles, scars and fat. Those ARE a part of me BUT they do not define me. Do I love them? No. But damn it, I am not going to beat myself up over my “flaws” – those aren’t flaws, those are me! Beating myself takes up space in my head and doesn’t make me happier with myself.
This is not necessarily about self-love but more about NOT hating on yourself.
Flexing in 2011 😉
I’ll never be 110 pounds again. I am not the same person. I didn’t have a child, a business, a house to take care of, a husband…and I was in my early 20’s! It was just me – no responsibilities. Plus, I didn’t have MY muscles…I love MY muscles!
I worked hard for my muscles.
I worked hard for my stretch marks.
My scars tell a story.
I worked hard for the body I have – and I am proud of it!
Still flexing in 2017!
I am happy with how I feel, how my clothes fit and how I can perform in the game of life. The number on the scale is just a number. It doesn’t define you. You define who you are, not a number, a wrinkle or cellulite. Stop worrying about what you look like and start focusing on how you feel. When Ben was going through chemo, I didn’t care how I looked. But, when I ate crappy food or didn’t exercise, I could tell a difference in how I FELT.
Focus on making your self feel better, stop worrying about the scale or how you look. We have seen it time and time again, happiness is not tied to how you look. Stop chasing that. Start chasing feeling better!
Are you tired of BEING TIRED?
Are you sick of BEING SICK?
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